Youth Development

Posted by Susan Carney

When my husband and I pick our kids up from daycare, we often stand outside and peer through the window to watch the kids for a few minutes before entering the classroom. We like observing them, unseen, to see how they interact with the other kids when they don’t know we're watching. As they get older, this becomes more difficult. Even if they don’t spot us, it isn’t long before one of their classmates spies us and rushes over and loudly announces our presence.



Yesterday we saw something that disturbed us. Our son walked over to a little girl and deliberately stepped on her foot. It surprised us because he is generally such a loving, gentle little boy. But here he was, purposely being mean to another child who was standing there minding her own business.



The jig was up when we told him that we had seen what he did and told him how disappointed we were in his behavior. We walked him through the steps of apologizing to the little girl (who, quite frankly, didn’t even seem to remember the incident). It would have been easy to just let this whole situation slide, but we are painfully aware that we are trying to raise two kids to be kind and considerate people in a world that sometimes seems to have forgotten what it means to have a strong character, to care about others, and to take responsibility for your mistakes.



These are hard lessons, and ones that will take many years to teach. But we have to start young, and we have to be painfully consistent. Kids need to know what we find unacceptable, and they need to understand how to make amends when they have wronged someone.

Posted by Susan Carney

It’s that time of year when 5th and 6th graders start anticipating the transition into middle and junior high school. Kids (and parents, too!) are often anxious about the change. They often don’t know what to expect, and wind up relying on rumors and misinformation. If this sounds like you or someone you know, you might want to check out the articles Preparing for Middle School, Top Stresses for Middle Schoolers, and Surviving Middle School for some ideas that can help.

It’s also the time of year when kids' interest in school starts to wane. The weather is warm, the end is in sight, and often kids would rather be anywhere else. You might want to look into Keeping Kids Motivated for some ideas on how to keep things running smoothly during that (seemingly endless) home stretch.

If you want to let your kids burn off some of that energy they’ve been storing up during the winter, try some group games. Not only are they fun, but they help kids develop skills in the areas of teamwork and cooperation, as well as helping them learn to communicate and follow directions. Try Team Building Activities for Teens or Group and Classroom Games for some ideas.

Posted by Susan Carney

American Idol aired its annual “Idol Gives Back” show Wednesday night, using the show’s massive popularity to draw attention to a variety of causes and the difference donations of service and money can make.

Many of these causes existed in other countries (kids who were dying of malaria for want of a mosquito net, or kids who didn’t have access to clean drinking water, for example). But segments also exposed middle class America to sights in their own country that they might not otherwise see. Even within our own borders, there are kids living in what most of us would consider horrible conditions.

You can’t help but be moved by viewing something like that.

“Giving Back” is not reserved only for adults, however. Kids of all ages can get involved in service. In fact, service and volunteerism are powerful learning tools that benefit kids in many ways. They learn compassion and empathy, and their own self-esteem is boosted with the realization that they can make a difference to someone else. Their perspective can undergo major shifts as they realize how lucky they are in comparison to others. They may develop a renewed sense of appreciate for what they have. And they learn valuable skills, such as working on a team and problem-solving.

Encourage your kids to get involved. By “Giving Back”, they may get back more than they ever expected.

Check out The Youth Services Opportunity Project or Servenet.org for more information.

Posted by Susan Carney

In my local Sunday paper, there was an article about the recent trend of custom painting guns in bright colors, causing the possibility of confusing them with toys. This, coupled with the fact that actual “toy guns” are often so realistic looking they can be difficult to distinguish from the real thing, is creating a dangerous situation. While I am certainly concerned about the distinct possibility of confusing these real guns with toy guns, there is another element to this issue that was missing from the article.

These guns are being decorated in this fashion in order to boost sales. In that way, they are not unlike many other products. One can easily purchase almost any item (for example, a car, cell phone, computer, etc.) in an array of colors or themes. Designs, packaging, and other product elements are often created especially (and often with the help of licensed characters or other popular symbols) to appeal to certain age groups. Like kids.

It’s one thing when a product promoted to appeal to kids is relatively benign. It’s another thing altogether when it’s a lethal weapon.

One could argue that the colors and designs aren’t “intended” to appeal to kids. But consider “a child sized shotgun decorated with pink and black swirls” or “a .22 caliber rifle for youths-the Davey Crickett- that’s red, white, and blue.” (Sam Wood, “Which is the Real One?” Philadelphia Inquirer, 3/30/08). Whether intentional or not, these would probably appeal to kids.

Posted by Susan Carney

A few weeks ago I received an email from the Campaign for a Commercial Free Childhood whose mission is to “counter the harmful effects of marketing to children through action, advocacy, education, research, and collaboration.” Since this stuff is right up my alley, I am a subscriber to their “Action List”, and frequently get alerts from them when someone, somewhere exploiting kids to make money.

I’ve written about this topic in articles and blogs before, so to faithful readers, my ire at this most recent development should come as no surprise. It seems that the Nationwide Children’s Hospital in Columbus, Ohio plans to rename it’s ER “The Abercrombie and Fitch Emergency Department and Trauma Center” in trade for a $10 million donation.

Many of you who feel as I do about marketing to kids may be aware of Abercrombie’s reputation for sexualizing kids through their products and marketing. Clothing designed for preteens emblazoned with provocative messages advertised through the use of unnaturally thin body types is bad enough in the department store. However, bringing the Abercrombie brand and all that it represents to an institution supposedly dedicated to health and well-being seems irresponsible.

It infuriates me when people promote unhealthy messages to kids for any reason. Doing it in pursuit of money, whatever the reason, is, in my opinion, inexcusable.

For information about how to get involved in this and other CFCC inititative, check out their website.

Posted by Susan Carney

MSNBC recently released the findings of a new report from the journal “Health and Education Behavior” that found that 17% of 6th graders have tried alcohol. This means that almost 1 in 5 eleven and twelve year olds have experimented with alcohol.

This information may not be surprising to some, but it should be a concern for all. The questions are many. Where are these kids getting the alcohol? Who is (or isn’t) supervising them? Where is this happening? It also speaks to the ever present need to find alternate, positive activities for teens. We all know that kids who are actively engaged in healthy activities in their schools, communities, and churches are less likely to experiment with drugs and alcohol.

Are these kids with undiagnosed mental health problems who are attempting to self-medicate? Or just bored kids with nothing to do? What kinds of role models are we presenting? What kind of messages are we sending about responsible alcohol use, either personally or through the media?

We also need to examine our prevention efforts. April is Alcohol Awareness Month, and you can check out The National Clearinghouse for Alcohol and Drug Information for information and ideas you can implement with your kids.

Posted by Susan Carney

Driving to work today I heard on the radio that March is National Red Cross Month, and that got me thinking about blood donation. I’ve always been a pretty regular blood donor. I have the universal blood type, and I like knowing that my blood could help practically anybody. I recognize the importance of having blood available when you need it. My twins were born 12 weeks premature, and my daughter required a blood transfusion when she was only a couple of weeks old. I was unable to donate because of my post-delivery status, and my husband was the wrong type. We were grateful that because of an unknown donor, my daughter was able to continue her fight to stay alive.

I just gave blood a few weeks ago at my church. At the time, it occurred to me that blood donation could be a perfect vehicle to get young people involved in service. It’s free and it doesn’t require a lot of time. It’s relatively convenient, as blood drives can be set up practically anywhere, even in local high schools. And, if you can get past the needle stick and the blood-draining-out-of-your-arm concept, it’s fairly painless. Plus, they give you food!

Encourage your kids to sign up for a blood drive soon. Even better, look into hosting one at your school or agency. Get kids involved in the planning and advertising, and use the experience as a learning tool. You can easily incorporate math, reading, writing, science, and other skills into this type of project. Check out the Red Cross website for info blood donation as well as other ways kids can volunteer.

Posted by Susan Carney

Our state tests are coming up in the next few weeks, and our students are already starting to freak out a bit.

The mere mention of these tests is often enough to induce groaning and general annoyance (at the very least), possibly even anger and a curse word or two (at the other extreme). Ever since “No Child Left Behind”, these tests have, in the minds of many educators, created more problems then they have solved.

The reasons are many and I won’t go into them here. What concerns me the most is how these tests impact our kids. As if they don’t have enough stress in their lives, now we’ve gotten them all worked up about this test. This one test, given on this one day, which is going to (fairly or unfairly) represent the total sum of their academic achievement. No matter if they aren’t feeling well, don’t test well, have learning problems, don’t put forth effort on tests, or had a family tragedy the night before. The test goes on.

As educators, we’ve been forced to worry about the test and it’s results. And that worry has trickled down to our kids. Many teachers feel that the pressure surrounding these types of tests has negatively impacted education. They feel that it has taken all of the joy out of teaching.

And more importantly, all the joy out of learning.

On a side note, check out Pass The Torch for the opportunity to win a copy of the book "Your Child's Strengths" by Jenifer Fox. This book provides parents and educators with suggestions for focusing and building upon kid's strengths, rather than attempting to "fix" what is wrong with them.

Posted by Susan Carney

Body dissatisfaction is an increasingly serious issue among our young people. Pressures from the media, the fashion industry, peers, and family all contribute to the stress kids feel surrounding having the “right” body type. As educators, we often fight an uphill battle. We try to encourage our kids to feel good about themselves, despite the conflicting messages they hear all around them.

National Eating Disorders Awareness Week is February 24 – March 1, 2008. The goal of this event, sponsored by the National Eating disorders Association, is “to teach people of all ages about the importance of promoting positive body image as well as raise awareness about the dangers of eating disorders and the need for early intervention and treatment by distributing educational materials and organizing events in their communities.” (from the NEDAW website).

By visiting the event website, you can access the resources and information you need to plan your own NEDAW activities and events. Coordinator Kits are available for purchase for those interested in jumping right in. These kits include posters, planning guides, presentations, press releases and other promotional ideas. It also includes tons of great handouts and other resources. Purchasing your kit now will give you a whole year to plan exciting, inspiring events for your kids for next year’s NEDAW.

In the meantime, checkout “Things to Do During National Eating Disorders Awareness Week”, a handy list of suggestions we can implement anytime with our students. These are quick ideas or reminders about promoting awareness and acceptance of individual body types. At some point next week, try to incorporate a few of these strategies into your work with kids.

You may also be interested in checking out the previous Youth Development articles Extreme Dieting and Plastic Surgery or Girls and Positive Body Image.

Posted by Susan Carney

Today is my kids' first preschool Valentine's Day party. We spent one evening this week writing out our valentines according to a careful and precise list of students sent home from their school. My three year old twins chose each child's valentine carefully, selected a sticker to put on it, and then I did the writing. Every child, of course, received a valentine from each of my kids. What an amazing lesson for them on appreciating others.

Often, the main focus of this holiday is on love and romance, and the marketing that we see at this time of the year reflects that. We see images of roses and other flowers, candies, hearts, and other symbols of romantic love.

Which is great, except for those who may not be in romantic relationships right now. For teens, Valentine's Day can be excruciating for those in that situation. They may feel left out of the festivities, or worse, as if everyone "notices" that they don't have a special someone. Overdoing Valentine's Day celebrations, with a sole focus on the love and romance part, can intensify feelings of loneliness for these students. Having a holiday to shine the spotlight on the fact that they are alone only makes things worse.

As an alternative, try making the focus of this holiday expressing your care and appreciation for everyone. This way, all kids can take part, as both givers and receivers. Appreciation can be shown for friends, parents, siblings, teachers, everyone. It doesn't need to be limited to that one special someone. Think back to your own childhood, when you sent valentines to everyone in your class.