The holiday season is a great opportunity to help kids focus on appreciating the things that they have.
It’s easy for kids to get caught up in the whirlwind of holiday marketing. Targeted advertising is heightened, cooler versions of old products are unveiled, and suddenly, the need to “get it now” takes hold. As a result, kids can easily become focused on how much “stuff” they can get during the holiday season. But what about gratitude? Do kids seem genuinely appreciative of their gifts, or have they become so accustomed to accumulating products that their “thank-yous” ring hollow, or worse, are absent altogether?
When kids get things too often or too quickly, they can develop a sense of entitlement. This entitlement can come across as being unappreciative, or, at worst, being selfish or spoiled. In order to prevent this, we need to make sure we regulate the things kids get and when, and also help them stop to recognize and show appreciation for them.
Think about the following ideas when working with your kids:
Help them Delay Gratification
Avoid buying things “on the spot” because your child has shown an interest. This kind of behavior will train your child to expect that their desires will be fulfilled immediately. Instead, wait awhile and then revisit the idea. Interest may have waned in the meantime.
Limit the Amount of “Stuff” Kids Have
Resist the temptation to give in to every desire. Kids often “want” an item based on the advertising, packaging, and “coolness factor” rather than because they will actually use or enjoy it. Help kids learn how to critically evaluate their requests by prioritizing their “wish lists” and verbalizing the reasons behind their choices. Purchasing a few well-chosen gifts is a healthier (and less expensive!) alternative to showering kids with tons of things they may never really use.
Help Them Learn Perspective
Take the opportunity to show kids that holidays aren’t about what you get, but about what you give. Small service projects around this theme can help kids develop empathy for others and realize how fortunate they are in comparison. You may want to become involved in a holiday food drive, “adopt” a needy family and purchase gifts, or fill another community need.
Find Creative Alternatives
All presents don’t have to be material. Think outside of the box when planning gifts for your kids. Try a coupon for a special dinner out with a parent, a letter telling him what a great kid he is, or another type of recognition. Kids enjoy feeling “special”, and gifts such as these set a terrific example for kids of the kinds of gifts they can give to others, regardless of financial limitations.
Show Thanks
Bring back the art of the handwritten thank you note. It’s not too much to ask a teen to take a few minutes to personally express their thanks. Not only is it a good learning tool; its just good manners. Make sure kids mention the gift by name, share something specific they like about the gift or how they will use it, and include a statement of gratitude.
You may also be interested in Positive Role Models for Teens.
