Teens and Cyber Safety talked about some of the inherent problems that exist online for teens. Here are some ways you can help kids stay safe and respectful online.
Private vs. public. Review with kids the types of info that are acceptable to publish online, and those that are not. Personal details help predators to get into kids’ heads, and develop relationships. Teens often don’t realize that the fourteen year old “soul mate” they think they’ve found could really be a fifty year old guy with bad intentions. Details that may identify kids and make them easy to locate can make them easy targets. Make sure kids know what kinds of information can be dangerous, and why.
Live and in person. Tell kids to be careful about trusting those they meet online. Many people are who they say they are, but many are not. If you learn that a teen has intentions to see someone they met online, be sure they don’t go alone. Supervision by an adult is a good idea until the person’s identity can verified. Since teens feel invincible, it’s up to you to point out potential landmines they might not see.
Jumping to conclusions. Remind kids that clarity in their messages is important, due in part to the lack of traditional body language cues that accompany spoken communications. Encourage them to preview messages before sending to determine if there is an opportunity for misinterpretation. Likewise, encourage them to clarify the meaning or intent of another’s messages before reacting to what they might perceive as anger or hostility. The communication skills they hone online will transfer easily to the real world.
Lowering the ‘”flame.” Teach kids how to make good decisions and how to resolve conflicts without threats or insults. Model appropriate ways to manage anger and disagreements. Show kids how to step back, cool down, and think about a situation before responding. Discourage “flaming wars”; instead, help kids take the high road by showing other options. Remember that they are always watching you for cues on how to act.
Learning to care. One of the components of cyber bullying is a lack of understanding about how one’s actions impact others. To combat this, provide supervised activities that teach empathy. Service projects that involve putting kids in a position of helping others helps them focus on someone other than themselves, as well as helping kids connect. Opportunities to help those less able or less fortunate can be especially powerful.
Potential consequences. Many kids don’t realize that online harassment can lead to police involvement. Postings to web sites or chat rooms, as well as email and instant messages, can be printed out and used as evidence; at the very least, their account can be cancelled by their internet service provider. Make sure kids understand the legal ramifications for internet behavior, as well as the limits of “free speech.” Threatening, bullying, or harassing someone doesn’t qualify.
Please also see also Cyber Safety and Teens.
